Oh man I’m so punny.
So I was mugged (see?) on the Friday of last week. I was just strolling down Walnut at about 1PM in the afternoon, minding my own business and enjoying what was a beautiful day, when one of three guys that had been walking in my direction on the sidewalk inquired, “Hey holmes, you have an iPod?”
At this point my brain didn’t quite register what what was about to transpire; I think my first reaction was the sort I’d normally have to a panhandler, so I managed to get out a “no” in response before a sucker punch came flying in my direction and took me unawares in the jaw. I’d never actually been punched in earnest before, and it was an interesting experience. It didn’t really hurt (and I didn’t even bruise afterward; it was either a glancing or a very weak-sauce swing), but it was rather disorienting, as one doesn’t normally expect to be punched by some stranger when walking down the street.
I sat down in an adjacent stairwell at that point, told them I had nothing, and ended up giving them my (cheap, free, Verizon) cell phone and $7 from my wallet. I really didn’t want them to actually take my wallet (it’s almost comical that my brain was thinking ahead to the pain in the ass that is dealing with credit companies and the DMV), so I just held it up and proffered the bills within. I also had my laptop in my backpack at the time, but I didn’t say anything about it, and these muggers weren’t very thorough (or intelligent, presumably, but then I wonder if any muggers are). All in all, a very poor take for the three (which looked about 20-ish), especially given the police now have a pretty accurate description of all of them.
Given the recent flurry of small (and not so small) crimes in and around Berkeley, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, but at the same time, this occurred in broad daylight in Northside, a block from gourmet ghetto. It’s definitely a little scary, but things could have been much worse. Life goes on, and the initial look-over-my-shoulder apprehension I had for the first few days after the attack has disappeared. Perhaps the worst part is that those assholes made me miss lunch with Cami! Luckily, the officer who took my statement was nice enough to drive by Oscar’s, where Cami was waiting and worried given I was 30 minutes late and not answering my (by then stolen) cell phone. It was very nice to have her around just then, too, as I was a bit shaken after the initial shock passed.
Funnily enough, my iPod, which I would normally have with me (I never leave the house without it) had just bit the big one a week earlier due to old age and hard drive failure. Had I still been using it, the muggers would have had something more to show for their misguided efforts, which makes me almost happy that the thing broke when it did :)
And, while I’m here, I’d like to shout out to everyone that I need to collect phone numbers! I’ve felt so naked this past week without a cell phone, but I have managed through bumming my roommates’ phones and directing people to call me on the house line. Now that I almost have my new one, however, I’m ready to start rebuilding the contact list (and this time I have Bluetooth functionality, which means I’ll be able to keep a copy on my computer). It will be activated tomorrow, so feel free to call me so I can add you (619/823-9312), or just shoot me a message or post here with your number.
Happy end-of-finals and gradumation everyone ^_^
Posted on 05/17/08 at 2:51PM, 2 Comments
Ten dollars if you can name that reference WITHOUT using our dear friend Google.
And I feel as if this week has been conducted under the influence of one. I’ve had the hardest time I can remember getting back into the swing of school, classes, homework, etc., and have instead felt like a big, lethargic Slacker McSlackyPantsâ„¢. Work hasn’t been as much an issue, as I was working during Spring Break already, but academia is not overflowing with appeal at the moment.
Maybe it’s the annoying campaigners on campus that feel the need to bug you whenever you dare venture outside the lecture hall (I’m wearing headphones for a reason, thanks). Or perhaps it’s my brain’s way of rebelling for not getting to sleep in all of last week, which would have been preferable. But I believe the main factor is simply an advanced case of that dreaded disease that eventually affects even the most studious of students. It’s been creeping up on me for a while now, but the past week–in which my brain practically turned off for the duration–was impetus enough to kick it into overdrive.
Or maybe underdrive?
The weekend is now here, so hopefully I’ll be able to satisfy the latent desire to vegetate for the next few days and pick up the pace come Monday. Of course, I’m always a procrastinatory son of a bitch to some extent; I just know that the key is reaching that threshold necessary to distract those responsibilities breathing down your neck for just long enough to pass muster. And yes, I know that they’ll return eventually. Then the process begins again.
But I won’t worry about that until next week.
Posted on 04/04/08 at 4:35PM, No Comments
It’s been almost three weeks since, but I recently turned 22. Hooray?
Alas, the post-21 world is lacking in the anticipation of previous years, as there are really no further privileges to be unlocked with the arbitrary key of age. Unless, that is, you frequently rent cars, in which case the economic benefits of your 25th birthday will relieve you of great monetary hardship. I’m much more a fan of borrowing my roommate’s car, however, so the flair of that particular achievement doesn’t shine very brightly from four years afar.
I also received plenty of questions concerning the way I “feel” about being 22, a question which is invariably asked on every birthday yet remains eternally puzzling. Age is an artificial concept, one invented more for utility than anything; it is better, after all, than referring to individuals as “old guy,” “older guy,” and “oldest guy.” Yet people always wonder whether some magical change occurs on that one date a year, and my answer is more or less the same each time it’s asked: a shrug.
Yeah, passing the “legal” mark had its novelty, and proper access to alcohol was certainly appreciated last year, but the definition of “me” has not undergone any drastic alterations because of those events. The aging process is a gradual one, and though I may be surprised 18 years from now when I look back and realize, “Holy hell, I’m fucking old!”, it’s never that jarring when living the moment.
But, all pontificating aside, it was not a bad birthday, as there were plenty of friends, poker chips, and (most importantly) beer to tide everyone over. Cameron was down for the last few days of break, lending a nice touch to the otherwise testosterone-thick atmosphere (what a juicy image, ha!), and it was good to see the old gang back together on familiar turf. I rarely get to spend much time at home these days, so Winter Break in general is an anticipated and nostalgic event.
And of course, a big thank you to all those who left me electronic messages of well-wishing. It’s always fun to log into your neglected Facebook profile only to be buried under a pile of wall posts. One of these days I’m going to throw the party I’ve talked of for so long, and we’ll boogie down like we were meant to. In the meantime, stay classy, and much love for all those I cherish.
Posted on 01/28/08 at 3:14AM, No Comments
As many of you may know, my roommate Charles is rather addicted to playing his favorite videogame, World of Warcraft. He generally plays at least four to five hours per day (often more), and as such is glued to his chair on a constant basis. So, being the kind-hearted and thoughtful person that I am, I asked myself: what might I do to make Charles’ game-playing bouts more comfortable?
After considerable consideration, much wracking of my brain, and a fortuitous find next to the dumpster in our parking garage, I have at last found the solution! (Click for larger version.)
Finally, Charles’ marathon sessions will be able to continue truly uninterrupted! No more pesky bathroom breaks will be required. All that’s left is to bring the mini-fridge into the room, stock it with caffeinated beverages, hook his arm up to a nutrient-providing IV, and he’ll be set for life. To think that I, one of Charles’ truest and most cherished friends, have made possible such a glorious future for him. Sometimes I amaze even myself with my benevolence.
Posted on 01/19/08 at 9:36PM, No Comments
Fine manual? Fine, you say? What is this nonsense? In response, I point you to this Adobe support page, where it seems one of their writers has a sense of humor.
InDesign’s comprehensive Help system is available to you on your computer. Check it out; you may find all you need there. Be prepared to be told to Read The Fine Manual (RTFM) if you skip this step.
The emphasis is mine, but that bit sticks out even without the benefit of bold typeface. For the uninitiated, RTFM is a well-known internet acronym used to berate those who ask questions which have either obvious or easily locatable answers (Google is your friend!). However, the “F” definitely does not stand for “Fine”.
RTFM informal computing
read the fucking manual (used esp. in electronic mail in reply to a question whose answer is obvious).
That’s from the Oxford American Dictionary, which proves just how prolific the expression has become. It is well documented in popular culture, and though I’ve only heard it spoken out loud a handful of times, it is often used on the web in the presence of unintelligent life (which, alas, is even more widespread than this expression).
In any case, I appreciate Adobe’s playful deployment of this phrase, however mitigated, in their copy. Of course, humor cannot alter the fact that InDesign’s XML support is a horrid POS (Piece Of Stool), but I at least got a laugh out of the deal before resuming my seething anger over their ineptitude.
Posted on 09/14/07 at 1:54PM, No Comments
