Schlaf gut

Sleep has to be one of the society’s most undervalued commodities.

The eight-to-five workday is evidence enough. Its inventor obviously had a quite evil disposition, or was addicted to caffeine pills; either way, it continues to have disastrous consequences for the modern individual. Lack of sleep has caused national sanity levels to spiral downward at unprecedented speeds. Those countries that practice the afternoon siesta are a little better off, but the effects are merely delayed, as no amount of napping can make up for missed R.E.M. cycles.

Is it some conspiracy spawned by the cosmetics industry? The dark-circled eyes of a tired world leave no short supply of customers, after all. Or is it some sort of passive, 1984-esque control mechanism, keeping the masses just tired enough to overlook all the unanswered questions and authoritarian abuses of our time?

Whatever the case, I’m sleepy.